Books like How to Win Friends

If you liked Carnegie, start with Leil Lowndes’s How to Talk to Anyone for concrete conversation habits, then pick from the others by what you want to improve. We ranked the books by how closely they match Carnegie’s aim, which is practical advice a reader can use in the next conversation.

All authors, years and premises below come from publisher pages, the authors’ own material or Wikipedia. Our own read on each is marked as such.

What books are similar to How to Win Friends and Influence People?

The books below share Carnegie’s focus on everyday behaviour, each with a different angle.

Book	Author	Year	Angle
How to Talk to Anyone	Leil Lowndes	1999	Conversation habits
Supercommunicators	Charles Duhigg	2024	Reading the type of conversation
The Fine Art of Small Talk	Debra Fine	2005	Starting and ending conversations
Captivate	Vanessa Van Edwards	2017	Behavioural science of connection
Crucial Conversations	Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler	2002	High-stakes talks
Influence	Robert Cialdini	1984	How persuasion works
The Like Switch	Jack Schafer	2015	Likeability from an ex-FBI view

1. How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes (1999)

Lowndes’s book is a collection of 92 short tricks for conversation and relationships, per its full title. It was first published in London by Thorsons in 1999, with a US edition from Contemporary Books in 2003.

The format is its strength: short, concrete and easy to try. Some tricks are more performative than Carnegie’s, so keep the ones that feel like you.

Best for: readers who want a checklist of things to try tomorrow.

2. Supercommunicators by Charles Duhigg (2024)

Published by Random House, the book argues that every conversation is practical, emotional or social, and that you connect by recognising which one it is and matching it.

That framing is a useful modern update to Carnegie’s advice to listen first. It is more about understanding than technique.

Best for: readers who want the reasoning as well as the tips.

3. The Fine Art of Small Talk by Debra Fine (2005)

Its subtitle promises to show how to start a conversation, keep it going, build networking skills and leave a positive impression. Hachette published it in 2005 and released a revised edition in 2023.

It is narrower than Carnegie and more practical about the awkward moments: openers, follow-ups and exits.

Best for: people who freeze at events or with new colleagues.

4. Captivate by Vanessa Van Edwards (2017)

Portfolio published Captivate in 2017. The publisher describes it as a science-backed manual for succeeding with people, built on the author’s research lab.

It leans on behavioural findings, so treat individual claims as ideas to test rather than settled fact.

Best for: readers who like frameworks and observation.

5. Crucial Conversations by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan and Switzler (2002)

McGraw-Hill published it in 2002. It offers strategies for discussions where stakes are high and opinions differ.

It picks up where Carnegie’s part on avoiding arguments leaves off, with more method for conflict.

Best for: managers and anyone facing a hard conversation.

6. Influence by Robert Cialdini (1984)

Cialdini’s book, described on Wikipedia as first published in 1984 and reissued as Influence: Science and Practice, sets out principles such as reciprocity, social proof and liking.

It is about persuasion more than friendship. It reads best as a way to notice what is being done to you and to persuade honestly.

Best for: readers interested in the psychology behind Carnegie’s persuasion chapters.

7. The Like Switch by Jack Schafer (2015)

Atria Books published it in 2015, written with Marvin Karlins. Its premise, from the publisher, is a former FBI agent’s guide to influencing and winning people over.

It treats likeability as a set of behaviours, which sits close to Carnegie’s Part Two.

Best for: readers who like a behavioural, case-driven approach.

How can you practise what these books teach?

Reading is the easy half. Practise with a friend who will role-play a difficult chat, record yourself telling a short story, or join a group such as a Toastmasters club. The What To Say section has 61 scripts in 8 categories, in warm, playful or direct tones, which helps with openers and replies from books like Lowndes’s and Fine’s. The first two scripts per category are free. Get Volo on the App Store. See also our social skills guide and best social skills apps.