How to Stop Saying Um, Like and Other Filler Words

Filler words are what your mouth does while your brain finishes the next sentence. You don’t stop them by trying harder not to say them. You stop them by closing the gap they’re filling.

Why do we say um in the first place?

We say um because speech runs ahead of thought. When you reach the end of a phrase and the next one isn’t ready, your mouth produces a placeholder to hold the floor: um, uh, like, you know, so, basically. It’s a signal to the listener that you’re not finished. Under pressure the planning gap gets longer, so the fillers get more frequent and more audible.

Two things follow from how fillers work. First, fillers aren’t a vocabulary problem, so a mental “don’t say um” doesn’t work; the word arrives before the instruction. Second, anything that shortens the gap between thoughts removes fillers without you having to police them. That’s where the method comes from.

Step one: how do you hear your own filler words?

Record yourself speaking for two minutes and count the fillers, because almost nobody hears their own. You cannot fix what you can’t hear. Explain something you know well, then count. Most people are surprised, and the surprise is the beginning of the change.

Do this daily for a week. The count usually drops before you’ve done anything else, because awareness alone starts to close the gap.

Step two: why does slowing down reduce filler words?

Slowing down is the single most effective fix for filler words, because it gives your next thought time to arrive. Fast talkers produce more fillers because they arrive at the end of thoughts before the next one exists. Slowing your pace by even fifteen percent gives your planning time to catch up, and the placeholder becomes unnecessary.

Slowing down feels wrong from the inside. It sounds, to you, like you’re being ponderous. To the listener it sounds like you know what you’re talking about. Record both versions and compare; the slower one is almost always the more credible one.

Step three: what should you say instead of um?

Say nothing: replace the filler with a silent pause. A silent pause does the same job as “um”: it holds the floor while you think. The difference is that a pause reads as deliberate and a filler reads as anxious.

The pause feels longer than it is. A one-second silence feels like five to the speaker and like nothing to the audience. Practise leaving it. Say your phrase, stop, breathe, say the next one. You’ll feel exposed and sound composed.

Step four: how do complete sentences cut filler words?

Finishing each sentence cleanly removes most “like” and “you know”. A lot of “like” and “you know” comes from sentences that trail off rather than end. Decide, as you start a sentence, where it lands, and land it. Full stop. Then the next one. Speaking in complete sentences forces the planning to happen before the mouth opens, which is where it belongs.

Step five: how often should you practise to stop saying um?

Practise out loud for two minutes a day, with a recording you listen back to. Reading about fillers changes nothing. Speaking does. Read a paragraph aloud, or explain your day, or rehearse the opening of a presentation. Count the fillers, note the pace, do it again tomorrow.

Measurement helps more than willpower does. A filler count and your words per minute after each attempt turn a vague intention into a number you can watch fall. The drop tends to hold when it comes from a slower underlying pace rather than from trying harder.

Which filler words matter most?

Um and uh matter most, because listeners notice them first and link them with uncertainty. Not all fillers matter equally.

• Um and uh are the most noticed and the most associated with uncertainty. Priority one.
• Like is the most habitual and the hardest to hear in yourself. Recording is essential.
• So at the start of answers and right? at the end are conversational tics that make you sound less sure than you are. Easy wins once you notice them.
• Basically, literally, actually are padding rather than fillers. Cut them in edits; they’ll follow in speech.

How do you stop saying um in conversation, not just presentations?

Use the same method in conversation at lower intensity: work on pace and pauses and let the count fall on its own. In conversation a few fillers are invisible, and hunting every one of them makes you stilted. Aim for the pace and the pauses, and let the count fall on its own. The person you’re talking to will notice that you seem calmer and more sure of yourself, and they won’t be able to say why.

How can you practise cutting filler words before it counts?

You can practise with anything that plays your voice back and gives you a number to beat.

• Your phone’s voice memo app. Record two minutes, count the fillers by hand and time yourself to work out words per minute.
• A speaking club. Toastmasters clubs often appoint an “ah-counter” who tallies each speaker’s fillers.
• Announcer Studio in Volo. Volo, an iPhone app for social skills, has 15 read-aloud scenes, from a gate announcement to an office presentation and a wedding toast. After each take it reports your words per minute, your filler-word count and your longest pause, plus a coach note. The free version includes one scene, The Gate Announcer.

What mental shift makes it stick?

Treat silence as thinking time, not as a failure. Silence is the space where the good sentence forms. Speakers people trust use more of it, not less. Once you believe that, the pause stops feeling like a gap you have to fill and starts feeling like the most confident sound you make.